By Sharanya Manola Last Updated:
There is no couple in this entire world that hasn’t had an argument. Whether big or small, we have all had our share of sour times when a situation goes out of hand. But, there are some couples that deal with issues more intelligently.
This determines the quality of relationship they are in and the fact that they value each other and place their partner above all. So, here are a few ways which smart and happy couples adopt to sort out their problems, without indulging in a fight.
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As adults, they are mindful of the fact that they are not in their teens when they would get swayed away by heated arguments and not be able to differentiate between right and wrong. They don’t believe in name calling or making sarcastic remarks because that’s the worst they can do to each other. This is because even if the one who makes these remarks apologises, it leaves a scar beyond repair on the other person’s heart and mind. So, why even risk causing such pain?
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It takes time to master the art of allowing the other to talk when one of the two is in an emotionally charged state. But, you can learn a thing or two from couples who know the importance of both being heard and listening to what the other has to say. Such couples know that the outcome of any heated exchange is not going to be favourable because it builds up the crescendo for worse.
These couples know when to start a discussion instead of ignoring the issue at hand. They do so because they want to acknowledge a problem and together work out a solution, instead of letting it damage their relationship. Often most couples lack this realisation and find themselves locking horns for no reason at all.
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Just because they fight differently does not mean that they do not lose their calm. If they do feel the emotional turmoil, they take time to cool off. But then again they do not just abandon the conversation. They convey why they need time and come back to discuss it, perhaps in a couple of hours. Usually when they do so, they are mutually able to resolve their differences, as compared to when they are both emotionally overcharged and cannot take a rational decision.
Arguments happen because there is a collision of two perspectives, but successful couples empathise and understand where their partner is coming from. They admit to being two different individuals with different value systems and give each other a benefit of doubt. They do not jump to conclusions mid-way in the argument because they want to come to a mutually beneficial resolution.
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The moment you forget you are a team, you lose half the battle and put your relationship at stake. But, happy couples are those that know they cannot be at war for long and that too for issues that are nothing more than difference of opinions. They know how important their partner is for them and cannot do/say something, which will result in long-term damage.
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Fighting and arguing are the easiest, but brashest ways to get out of a problem. But, we rarely realise that excessive fighting can doom our relationships with our partners. So, now that you know of many different ways to solve your ‘couple problems’, we are sure you will incorporate them in your life and benefit from them.