Love marriages once happened only in films. But they are becoming more and more common today, so that it is not longer unheard of for people to marry outside their caste or their community. Chetan Bhagat’s book, 2 States, reflects the reality of life for many couples today.
So if you have found Prince Charming (or think you have) and want to spend the rest of your lives together, it is best to break the news to your families as soon as possible. There is a reality TV show on Channel V, Love Kiya To Darna Kya, that helps you to just this.
However, I think showing up with cameras and a VJ is not the best way to go about breaking the news of a significant other to your families. A gentler and more diplomatic approach is more likely to bring about even the most reluctant of parents, in my humble opinion.
So before you go about breaking the news to your parents, you require three things, namely:
Instead of introducing that special someone as your future fiancé to your parents, which might set their backs up, you may want to break the news gently. Here are some suggestions:
1. Ease him in: Ask him to come over 'for tea' and tell your mom a 'friend' is coming. If they're smart, they will figure out by themselves the third time he lands up 'for tea'.
2. Dinner and a movie: "Mum, Rajesh and I are going for a movie." "Dad, Rajesh and I are going for a party." If this won't tell them who Rajesh is to you, nothing will.
3. Phone your mom: "Mom, there is someone I want you to meet. When can I call him over?" This classic line allows you your dignity, gives your mother the breaking news, and ensures that she pacifies your dad by the time you get home.
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4. Hint-hint: This is a favourite, too. Call the boyfriend over, three or four times, with your other girlfriends. Slowly ease him into your family life. Until one day, your mom will suggest you date / marry him. "He's such a nice boy..."
5. Ready to get engaged: Depending on how serious you are about the guy and what your relationship with your parents is like, you could even introduce a boyfriend at an advanced stage of dating-when you two want to get engaged.
6. Don't take every boyfriend home: Yes, it's natural for young people to try out different relationships, but don't confuse-or upset-your parents. Think about the impression on your siblings as well. Take the one that's meant for keeps, or else, keep him to yourself.
If you are really sure about the guy, even your parents will reflect that confidence in him and will have no problems! Remember, that it is best that your parents get to know about your boyfriend from you, rather than hear about it as an item of juicy gossip from neighbours or relatives!
Are there any suggestions that you think I’ve missed out on?
