By Megha Sehgal Last Updated:
The biggest fear before going on a first date is the possibility of awkward silences. Unguarded, free-flowing conversations make for a great meeting while one filled with odd pauses rarely leads to anything. The rule very well applies to first meeting in an arranged set up as well. The situation is more intense given the family pressure and most of the times family presence as well. Then how to avoid these awkward silences? Well, here are a few tips.
A little anxiety during the first meeting is natural, but do not get nervous. You are bound to lose control of the situation and create odd silences if you are nervous. Worse, you might end up asking stupid questions that might lead to odd pauses! Stay confident and be yourself to avoid awkwardness of any sort. Remember, it will show if you try too hard. It is very common for people to start overdoing things to hide their nervousness.
Chances are that the meeting has been arranged by your parents after skimming through several profiles. You might have gone through the general details and agreed to meet. However, when you go for the meeting, make sure you read the person’s profile and know the basic details about him/her.
If you ask general questions, you will get general answers. Mostly, these are short answers that would not lead to an elaborate discussion. So, ask specific questions about the person, family or anything that matters to you in the long run. Thorough reading of the profile, as mentioned in previous point, will help you frame the right questions. “What do you do?” may lead to a vague discussion. But “What is your work profile in xyz organization (where the person works)?” will lead to a better answer.
Well, if you are going to take the decision for your life, you better be paying attention! However, it is possible that distractions or even your nervousness might cause you to lose focus. You need not be a good talker, but being a good listener is important to carry on a great conversation. Be a good listener and pay close attention to what the other person is saying. This will help you take any conversation further without letting awkward moments come in between.
All silences may not be awkward. Our reactions to them, however, may make them so. Small gaps in between a conversation are normal. Do not try too hard to fill them in, and do not feel awkward about them. A casual, relaxed smile can be helpful in such cases.
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Enjoyable conversations are the first step towards a lasting relationship. But, do not let the pressure come in the way of being you. Keep your cool and talk confidently. All the best!