The great Indian arranged marriages can be at times maddening experiences. Especially, the girl who is going to tie the knot the arranged way, often has to go through drilling sessions. The very first experience comes, when despite her unwillingness, she gets ready traditionally, and appears in a set scene in the living room with a large tray of tea and snacks, acting as coy as possible. She sits only to be evaluated by the prospective groom and all his folks. This is just the beginning. The real film starts rolling when she realises what kind of man has come to marry her. If you are one among such would-be-brides, then give this a serious read to identify 10 type of guys you might come across when you set out for an arranged marriage.
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He comes to market himself. His shiny wagon, chic suit, swanky phone, ritzy watch are his publicity tools thatkeep shouting, “How rich am I!” Not to miss his snobbish attitude, which he has cultured along the way. He keeps reminding you that he has done you a favour by taking a few minutes from his extra-busy schedule. Well, if you are likely to judge the world including yourself on price tags, then only go for him.
You just met him only because your parents wanted you to do so. Not an hour passes since he leaves, that you are notified on your phone that Mr. X has sent you a friend request on FB, followed by a message on WhatsApp, Viber, Line, or literally wherever you are registered. Attention…attention! The guy you just assumed to be harmless, is a stalker. Well, this type does not stop just here. Even if you put it across clearly that you are not interested, he is hell bent he will not let you say ‘No’. If you ask for our suggestion, then we say do not encourage any more such stunts. Simply block him.
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“I was Mr. Punjab. I mean I participated in it. Actually, I had just started going to the gym, but fell sick. How does it matter? I will build body once we get married.” Ahem ahem! Can you smell something? Exaggeration is in the air! Can you cope up with it? We are sure you cannot, unless you share the same passion for hyperbole.
He comes with gelled spikey hair, asks for mineral water bottle and uses tissue to wipe even the newly bought crockery in which you have served the food. The moment he opens his mouth, he blabbers on about nothing, but the never-ending sagas of Manhattan, his recently purchased flat at Times Square, his tour to Las Vegas or criticising India for pollution, traffic in his suddenly developed pseudo-accent. He is that typical ‘Yo’ man. Are you feeling how desi you are in front of him? Please don’t! Simply stay away.
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Everything is going perfect and you have almost decided that he can be given a chance. Then from nowhere he shoots the question, “Are you a virgin?” Excuse me! Is he a man who anyhow comes closer to the definition of a modern-man? A question about fertility or any serious ailment would rather sound logical and acceptable for a forward-thinking girl, than a moronic question like this one. Ring the mental siren immediately as this man has a narrow mind. And, in future such queries will pop up every now and then. Can you take such muck?
He comes, he eats and he sees you, but the moment you mention your salary package, his face hangs long. From that very next moment, he gets hyper and tries to show his superiority by looking down on you and even passes sarcastic comments. Funnily, it is a fact that still majority of Indian men cannot digest the concept of a wife who earns more than them. Perhaps, his male ego is taller than the multi-storied building in which you work. Hence, let him enjoy the heights, and better look for a reasonable alternative. Snip off from such sexists.
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There are many who consider the bride’s family as a treasure box. Not just the family, even the guy shamelessly mentions about your sister-in-law has to be given gold jewellery, or how it is customary to gift each of his aunts and uncles, or how he wishes for a brand new SUV, and the list goes on. At the end, comes the punch line, “All these are for your daughter.” If you are saying yes, then get ready to see your parents being robbed blindly. Such a gold digger, and a spineless man should not be your husband. Ban him from even the vicinity of your house.
He is perhaps in his late 20s or early 30s, but all through his life the bills of his parties have been cleared by his dad’s credit card, and even the foreign trips he makes are sponsored by his dad as well. He simply flaunts a fancy designation in his dad’s business empire, but has no business to grow it further. This parasite even lacks a mind of his own. Thus for every question you ask, he looks at his mama and seeks for permission to open his mouth. And, for every answer he adds, “My mama wants it this way.” Let the puppet enjoy his parents lap!
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He tries to show interest in almost everything you do on this earth. His questions range right from which movie you like, which food you hate, what kind of friends you have, to where you go for your facials and what not? Given a chance, perhaps he would ask “Did you sneeze this morning?” Ugh! Are you looking for a life partner or a question bank who tries to pretend to be familiar with you by bombarding you with stupid questions?
The first thing he will do is compliment you on your nail paint. Next is his mention of some new hand crème he loves using. It is followed by the series of cosmetics you must try and the discussion leads to his set of self-grooming products that he cannot live without. How he is allergic to the sun and how each sun exposure is followed by de-tan facial and blah…blah…blah. Well, we do accept, a well-groomed man is actually a good thing. But, if he seems like the kind who is always distracted by a mirror, then do not hesitate to show him the door.
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Marriage is a bonding of lifetime, so do not go just by superficial shine. You must dig deep into the real character of your prospective groom. So, be wise whom you choose to be your man!
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