Have you ever watched Emotional Atyachar on Bindass? Then you know how frequently men in committed relationships, who claim to be deeply in love with their partners, betray them without a backward glance.
How do you know whether you can trust someone? After all, if your boyfriend is cheating on you, then you can always leave him. But what if it is your husband? In spite of the recent bill passing no fault divorce in India, it can still take you years to procure a divorce. Besides, in most conservative circles, the word “divorce” still carries a lot of social stigma with it.
So when it is time for you to get married, how do you sort the cheaters from those who will stay loyal to you?
First of all, you need to understand why men cheat, before you start identifying potential cheaters.
Excuse #1: Blame it on the genes
Theories in evolutionary psychology hold that the survival of the human race is dependent on men producing the maximum number of offspring. So according to this theory, men are hardwired to sleep with as many women as possible – after all, their genes are telling them to!
Bulls**t, ladies! There are plenty of guys who would surely love for women to believe this – after all, it takes all the blame off their shoulders. In fact, you may have heard some version of this excuse already. Some guys, if caught ogling another girl by their girlfriend, will try to defend and justify their behavior by saying, “I was only looking! I can’t help what my eyes look at, can I?”
Excuse #2: My girlfriend/ fiancée is too fat/ ugly/ dark/ unappealing
Was it because of me?
Did I not give enough attention to him?
Am I not attractive enough for him?
These questions, and others like them, often go through the minds of women who have been cheated upon.
Women in general, and Indian women in particular, tend hold themselves solely responsible for the success or failure of a relationship. But it takes two to tango. After all, no one held a gun against your man’s head and forced him to cheat.
And if he is blaming you for his actions, then he is an even bigger douchebag.
How do you identify cheaters of this variety beforehand? Simple! Is your boyfriend unwilling to take responsibility? Does he frequently blame you for his shortcomings? Then there’s a chance that he could potentially be a cheater of variety no. 2.
Excuse #3: It was too good an offer to turn down
For many men in a committed relationship, being pursued by another woman can be a surefire ego booster. Or, conversely, successfully pursuing another woman is a great way to boost one’s self esteem. I guess this excuse is in line with the conventional reason about why men cheat: sex, different sex, new sex and yet more sex.
What about you? Have you ever come across any of these types of cheaters?