Trust remains an integral element in building relationships. For any long-term relationship it’s important to be transparent. With transparency, however, comes the risk of disclosing and revealing the deepest and darkest of secrets from the past. The million dollar question that haunts many of us is how to divulge the details, without hampering the equation.
You need to develop the right amount of confidence in your relationship before you go about mouthing your secrets. And once you do, you will not just help knowing your stand in your relationship, but also strengthen the trust and confidence in your partner. But is the same applicable to all relationships? Based on his/her reactions and personality, you can assess how much and what should to be revealed.
Mature attitude If your partner is eager to listen and has a tendency to arrive at solutions with every discussion, no matter how negative they turn out to be, then it’s a good sign. However, if he/she shows extreme reactions with such issues and is over possessive about you, then it’s better to reveal less. Choose a suitable moment when your partner is in a good mood and ensure you don’t reveal more than he can handle.
Easily approachable Can you share about anything and everything under the sun with your partner? Does he/she always use proper judgment and reason in discussions? If yes, then you definitely should consider revealing about your “Ex-s”, and get the hidden burden off your head.
Calm and composed If your partner is calm and composed even in extreme situations and does the balancing act, then it’s a sure shot sign that he/she will absorb the details of your past affairs without any problem.
Liberal If your partner believes in the quote ‘Live and let live’, it’s a good sign. It shows he isn’t too bothersome and doesn’t treat you like his private property. In short, he/she isn’t too possessive about you. Such people often are accepting towards past break-ups. Go and make your heart lighter, you can also have a laugh or two on the “Ex-s”.
However if your would-be or current husband gets insecure about you talking to any Tom, Dick or Harry, then maybe you should not talk to him about your past. You should give him time to see if he matures with you. ‘Life is as simple as we make it’, simplifying or complicating life is in our hands and so are our relationships. Revealing past may be a good idea, but will depend upon how simple or complicated your partner is.