For every girl, getting married, entering a new family and starting a new phase of her life is pretty much the most special, yet scary phase of her life. Scary, because it is a new chapter, one that she has no idea about how it will shape up. There are new relationships to maintain, new expectations to fulfil, and so much more. And in doing all of that, a lot of women tend to get so deeply engrossed in their married life that they unknowingly end up making some serious mistakes [Read: 10 Ways You Are Unknowingly Hurting Your Husband And Destroying Your Marriage]. These mistakes can sometimes have severe consequences and leave her feeling alone and cornered. So, we get you the top 16 mistakes most women make after marriage which they definitely should stop doing!
Why does your career need to end when your marriage begins? Does your husband end his? Do you not have goals to conquer? And if you are being forced to do so, raise your voice as that is your right.
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Start a new life, but do not end your previous one. Real friends are your true pillars of strength and support. They should be valued and treasured throughout your life.
Like, for going to the market because you cannot drive, going to the doctor or the tailor, waiting for him to do a chore you asked him, etc. Get independent, and work your way around to get things done by yourself!
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You need to love yourself for others to love you. You need to respect yourself for others to respect you. If you underestimate yourself, the world will pounce on you to suppress you and make you do things in their favour.
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Pent up feelings that you store within yourself lead to resentment and frustration. Talking out loud about what is bothering you either to your husband, your sibling or your mother will make you feel lighter, and help you find some valuable solutions to your problems!
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You both have an individual life too. Giving each other space does not mean you disregard or love your partner any less. But, giving space and getting some ‘me time’ gives you time to connect with yourself, and your previous life!
If you are at fault, you should bear the brunt of it. But if you are not, why subject yourself to undue torture and insult? God gave you a voice, which you should use to defend your honour.
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You give your time, your energy and your life to your husband and new family without being even a tad bit selfish! Well, don’t you want to be pampered and looked after too?
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If you want to say something to your husband, just say it out loud and clear. Expecting him to read your mind and not telling him what is wrong even after he asks you a zillion times is most unfair to him!
And by overthinking, wasting precious time and stressing yourself out unnecessarily!
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Whether it is your fault or not, for some reason, you always end up feeling responsible for anything that goes wrong!
And, stopping him for going to his boy’s night outs, official trips and other places where you cannot be with him and hence, making him feel suffocated in your marriage.
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And, not getting to enjoy your newly-married life, travelling, night outs and just that special alone time with your husband, which actually is the phase you build a strong foundation for your marriage to rest on.
And, in the endeavour to enjoy your life and freedom just a little more, delaying your family planning until you reach the stage when things go out of your hands!
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And who did what! Why keep count? Isn’t it just better to keep doing your part and appreciate all the good things that your husband does for you instead of keeping a track?
Your husband, your home and then the kids; making your entire universe revolve ONLY around them! Not having your own friend circle, your own girlie gang, not enjoying spa days, short work vacations and things that you need to do for yourself keeping your marriage aside for some time!
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So ladies, if you too feel you are doing some or all of the above mentioned things, it is time for you to make a lifestyle change; a conscious effort to be more relaxed, selfish at times and understanding the importance of space. And, if you feel we have missed out on some points, add them down here in the comments!
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